Is your child on school roll, but struggling with attendance?
Having a child or young person who is struggling to attend school can be extremely distressing for everyone involved.
As parents, we want the best for our children and we have been made to believe that keeping them in school means that they get the best education. This is not always true
The school system is designed as a all round package for all children. However in life, we aren't all the same. What one person can cope with, another one cannot.
Schools have many amazing teachers who do their best, but the system sadly does not suit all children.
People need environments that help them thrive, and sadly, even with some adjustments, the school environment is just not suitable for some of our young people.
Since the Covid Pandemic, the number of children who struggle in school has significantly increased. Neurodivergent young people have the worst levels of school attendance. In fact a 2024 study on school absenteeism showed that 92% of children with attendance issues at school were either diagnosed or suspected neurodivergent.
If you need specific support, please do contact us!
Key things to remember when dealing with attendance issues:
1) Remember that it is your child and you need to make decisions around what is best for them.
2) Mental Health is more important than school attendance.
3) Keep everything in writing and work with the school. A lot of children thrive in school with the right support, so if you believe that this is your child, then fight for what they need.
Common Questions
Why won't my child tell me why they won't go to school?
It is highly likely that they do not know why. Often we say that a child 'won't' go to school. Often it is that they 'can't'.
Especially if your child is neurodivergent and is masking, or if they have suffered trauma such as bullying.
When someone has been repeatedly doing something that they struggle with over a period of time, it can lead to burnout. Once a child is in burnout, they will struggle to articulate their feelings and why they can and can't do things.
Everything will become hard.
School want a letter to authorise my childs absences, but I can't get one. What do I do?
Schools often refuse to authorise a child absence without medical information. This includes any medical absence, colds, anxiety, mental health etc
This is not correct!
Medical evidence should be used in minimal circumstances and mainly to ensure that children are getting adjustments they need in times of complex or long term health conditions. It should be used to enable them to have adjustments in school and not to authorise absences.
When authorising absences, parents should be able to inform the school of what’s wrong with their child. Schools should NOT be marking children as unauthorised absence because of a lack of medical evidence
GP's are also not funded to provide medical evidence to schools.
Here is a link to the full guidance
Are welfare checks from school needed?
Yes
I understand that when your child is absent from school, that welfare checks can be very stressful for you all.
Sadly there have been situations in the past where children have been off of school and seriously harmed, even killed.
As a result, schools now have an obligation to do reasonable welfare checks.
Reasonable would be weekly or fortnightly.
Checks often cannot be arranged in advance for safeguarding reasons
However, be aware that welfare checks should be very limited in their interaction. They should be able to see the child but are not entitled to enter your property, or engage in conversation about returning to school.
The purpose is just to ensure that your child has not come to harm.
Should I force my child into school?
Only you can decide what is best for your child but it is worth considering the following.
How is your childs overall mental health, are they coping generally in life?
How is there behaviour when they are in school?
What are they communicating to you with their actions?
In addition I would never recommend using any kind of force in getting your child to school.
When dealing with a child who is refusing to go to school, it is important to understand the long term effects on their mental health. Children and young people can learn in lots of different ways, and at different times in their lives. They can end up with very successful careers and do well in life regardless of what type of education that they have had.
The importance is that they have an education, not where or how that education takes place.
Mental health and long term relationships are harder to fix and some children never recover from trauma relating to school.
What are my options if my child won't go in?
You have the following options:
1)Force your child into school
2) Work with the school to look at temporary adjustments to enable them to attend
3) Consider home schooling (where your child learns from home but is still on the school roll) - This is often part of an alternative provision or a temporary measure to get a child back to school
4) Request an EHCP
5) Request an alternative learning provision or Education other than school (EOTAS) through the local authority
6) De-register your child and elect to Home Educate (where your child is no longer on school roll and you take responsibility for their education in full)
I think my child is neurodivergent, what do I do?
If your child is showing signs of being neurodivergent, you can request an assessment for Autism (ASD) or ADHD. This can be done in one of three ways:
1) Through your school. The school route takes time and you will go through a process with them that ends up with a referral to the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHS) for diagnosis. Unfortunately there is an extensive waiting list.
2) Request an assessment privately through a number of different providers. This can cost between £1500 - £2500
3) Request a referral via Right to Choose (RTC) with your GP. Currently this is available to all children for both ASD and ADHD. Some GP's refuse to do this, however it is your legal right so if you do decide on this route and get refused by the GP then let us know so we can help you.
Waiting lists for RTC are much reduced, however changes are pending so please visit your GP soon if this is the route you choose.
More details on the RTC providers and waiting list can be found on this facebook group.
Are you anti school?
No
At Birch & Bees we are pro education. We believe that every child deserves a quality education whatever that may look like.
As a society, we have been conditioned to believe that school is the only place that our children can be educated, and that we are doing them a disservice by not making them attend.
Schools are full of fantastic teaching staff who do their very best, and there are many children, both neurotypical and neurodivergent, who thrive in school.
However there are too many who struggle and we want a fairer system that allows ALL children to access education.
With adjustments in place, some children will be able to still do well in school, sadly some will not and the only option is to Home Educate.
There are so many options around educating your child, learning is everywhere. For some it is school, some it is not.
What is an EHCP?
An EHCP is an Education Health and Welfare Plan. It is designed to give your child the support that they need, through adjustments or additional support/equipment, to enable them to remain in school.
EHCP's can be instigated by the school or the parent and children do not need any diagnosis in order to have an EHCP
More information on how to apply can be found here:
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